Who’s your Friend

Walking into life with new perspectives…

Sometimes we wonder why we are unhappy with ourselves.

So we look back over the years to see what’s created this.

We see our friendships and relationships, or the choices we have made.

We start looking over how some people have treated us, and how we have allowed a lot of unkindness to step over the doorstep of our soul’s experience, and right into our circle of peace.

People will show you who they are.

They will literally tell you.

Sometimes in words, but other times with their actions.

It can takes years to really see who they really were.

It can also take years to see your own self.

Learning to have more kind friendships takes a lot of self-love.

It takes determination and commitment to self.

Learning that you deserve to be around people who lift you up, rather than put you down, seems like it is common sense.

Yet, sometimes we don’t realize these people are putting us down, until we take time away from everyone so we can look back and process over it all.

Looking over what people have said to us, how we feel when we are around them, and the choices we make when we are with them, are all key signs to pay attention to.

Having been through many layers of my own healing, I am really starting to learn how I FEEL matters.

Listening to my body, to my energy, to my spirit with so many different aspects of life, is beginning to make more and more sense for so many different reasons.

How do you feel when you are alone?

How do you feel in nature?

How do you feel around certain people?

Listen.

Pay attention.

It is all communicating with you.

💜

  • M.

The Sound of the Storm

The Sound of The Storm

On the harder days, I remember this day.

It reminds me of what I have gotten through.

Feeling the storms of my emotions, while getting my picture taken, not knowing what would come after.

Already working on dealing with so much trauma, and trying to survive, trying to keep my kids safe, though, it felt like there was danger coming.

Feelings erupting inside of me.

Feeling in a place of uncertainty, just as we tend to be, when in the middle of a storm.

After this shoot, I went for my daily walk and found my daughter was missing.

She was not where she was supposed to be, and when she knew I knew, she made it so I couldn’t call or text her.

It was a long weekend, trying to find her and get her home.

These are not stories I typically share on here, due to not wanting to over share, but sometimes I just need to release, for the healing, and to maybe help someone else.

Twenty six hours of not knowing where my daughter was, or if she would come home.

Twenty six hours of being in panic for her life and her wellbeing.

She finally returned home, and she was safe.

One more scar on my heart.

One more memory to remember how much I love her.

One more reason to show her more sensitivity and compassion.

This shoot really ended up representing more than Marina Shipova or I could have even imagined.

Life is always full of uncertainty.

We just have to muster the courage to keep going.

One step at a time.

One day at a time.

One moment at a time.

Find your peace.

Find your balance.

Find your strength.

You are capable of more than you know.

❤️‍🩹

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Darkness Tried to End this Life

Memories come up from times when life felt so close to the edge.

Life seemed like something so close to the end.

A mind so cluttered, so filled with fear.

A body so riddled with substances and unbalanced from the chase of night and day.

Thoughts fading away, worries taking over, friends with two faces taking up too much space.

There were times of silence towards the ones who were closest.

There were moments of sadness that lasted for days.

Yet, beyond the darkness, through the silence, there still seemed to be some light.

Falling away…

Falling under…

Never too deep, but just deep enough.

Finally one day, tired of suffering…

A reach up, a crawl, a walk and a run, back to life.

Back to peace.

Yet, never truly to feel without the darkness.

A darkness that had the deep calls for the ending.

Though, the darkness is not meant to call upon us all.

Some must just taste it, to see why we must turn away.

Back to the light.

In the light we must stay, but never to forget the bite of darkness that will never fully go away.

  • M.

Trust Yourself

Everyday we face challenges.

Everyday we are shown that we must choose.

Distractions or facing the truth.

You know what you need to do in order to be okay.

Trust yourself.

  • M.

Explore

Explore the world.

Explore yourself.

Do all the exploring.

For life is but a collection of moments, and

When you see how quickly time passes by,

You will wish you had spent more time exploring and enjoying all the beauties within this life.

You are worth the time.

⛴️

The Bridges of Life

There is magic in the journey.

We see where we want to be and we must let go of worrying how we will get there.

The bridges of life are not always for us to build, but they are a gift that we are guided to, that allow us to move from one chapter to the next.

We must not worry about how we will get to the next destination, we must only focus on visualizing where we want to go.

The journey is full of possibilities…

Remember to dream big, trust the process and have as much fun with it all as you possibly can.

-M.

A Journey Persisted

For as long as she could remember, she knew there would be something special for her…

For as long as she could remember, she knew she could never give up on believing in herself….

As the years went by, she continued to fall and then crawl through life’s challenges,

Until one day she remembered she could walk.

Then she quickly started to run.

She began sprinting, jumping and then finally she flew.

When she discovered her wings, she learned to float over those who didn’t believe in her or see her for who she was.

She didn’t worry about being alone, for she was always surrounded by so many who saw her for who she was and loved her no matter what, even through months and years of silence.

Whooshing through trees, flying beside mountain tops, she soared high above the clouds.

She flew up to the stars and zoomed back down, reaching the oceans and diving in like a sea creature, moving through the waters with great force.

Back to the surface, letting the air dry her off, she would then find a safe place to land.

Not for long though, as she found her place to be in the sky.

She knew she wasn’t like many others.

She knew she was made differently and created on purpose, for a purpose that was all her own.

Only she could know what that was, and what she was here for.

Though all the pieces may not make sense to others, she knew each one was meant for her, even the pieces that didn’t fit into the whole picture.

One day, maybe far off down the road, she would tell her story.

But for now, she will just continue to fly, soaring on her own, gliding from tree to tree, taking breaks on the mountain tops…

Solitude, this is her happy place.

At last, she knew, her purpose was there all along.

To be continued….

🤍

– M.

Remember

Fading

Who’s turn is it, mine or yours.

The colors are running dry, the brightness is fading fast.

Age is growing older, time is ticking by.

Who’s turn is it, mine or yours, is it time yet?

The time is ticking by.

Colors fade, time ticks away, and all we can do is keep on moving with each flow of the motions of life.

Each flow, each motion, each tick tock of the clock brings us closer to the other side.

For each new day, each new lesson, we each get to sit and wait…

We take turns experiencing lessons as we wait and wait for each new day to come and tick tock on by.

There is no time, really.

It is your turn, surely it is not mine.

Every day that passes, I have had experiences that have lasted me days upon days that I cannot even remember my first name.

They call you by your last name, leaving you to wonder who you even are anymore.

Let’s start writing, maybe keep track of things, so we can see where all of this waiting is leading us to.

The days tick on by, a wind blows, a hollow sound goes through one ear hole and out the other.

Is there even anything that comes after this?

Shall we sit here and wait until the last drop of color has faded away and the clock runs out of ticks and tocks?

I surely don’t even know when it was that I last ran through a field without a care.

It would be nice to eat without the fear of there being little left to eat upon the next morrow.

We shall sit and watch as the clock ticks away and the sun fades and makes its way below the horizon, leaving the twilight sky for us to rest upon.

As we lay awake in wonder, we may, oh we may, dream upon the twinkling sky, that we may awaken upon a new day with the brightest of colors.

Oh to heavens we may wish upon that we may awaken to plenty of food, and for all the clocks to have faded away so we may run into the field and pretend we have wings.

A day full of joy, full of wonder and plenty of laughter.

Upon this start I do wish.

Thank you, until we meet again.

– M.

Exist

In a day, so much can happen.

Slow down and listen to the sounds around you.

Shut off your thoughts and just allow the sounds to be your existence.

-M.